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November 15th, 2009
rdansky
 | 12:10 pm - Paranormal Quadruped Activity
Terrifying...
...if you're a goat.
Otherwise, a very enjoyable film.
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medievalstuff
| 04:00 pm - Swords exhibit in Littleton
http://larsdatter.com/wordpress/?p=493 “A Double-Edged Weapon: The Sword as Icon and Artifact” is at the Littleton Historical Museum in Littleton, Colorado, through January 24.
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vintagehair
[mizbonnieparker]
 | 05:47 pm - A little help ?
Hello !
I've been lurking for several months, while experimenting with my hair, and this community has been really helpful.
Now, I'm really able to style my hair so it doesn't get frizzy and out of control (it's quite thick and layered), but I'm still stuck on the haircut part.
My current haircut allows me to get a Clara Bow look which is a huge improvement in my everyday life. But since I tend to dress less 1930's and more 1950', I'm aiming for ( this )
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longhair
[slightlysoprano]
 | 11:37 am - Just to make sure I understand...
Since I have curly hair, should I never ever ever (ever?) use a brush? Ever? Just a wide toothed comb? Really?
oh boy...
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/classic/confused.gif) confused
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novel_in_90
[qumabh]
 | 08:31 am - Word Count for November 15th
"One writes out of one thing only--one's own experience. Everything depends on how relentlessly one forces from the experience thelast drop, sweet or bitter, it can possibly give."
~James Baldwin~
Holy Hippogriffs! I am on a writing spree. In the past 24 hours, yes I was up ALL night, I have written10,575 words. OMG--May the mania never end. I'm having too much fun.
~Mab
Sound Off!
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islenskr
 | 09:44 am - Trying to do something better - praiseworthy or just crazy?
Recently, I've been given to thinking quite a lot about being an 'over-achiever' and a 'perfectionist'. These terms have been used by several people about me, which, as far as I can tell, means 'trying to achieve perfection; that is, trying to do something impossible'. I like to think what it really means is 'trying to do something in an above-average manner to attain above-average results', which by some people could be construed as being the same thing. This bothers me. I very much like learning about how to make things and it pleases me greatly when I think I've got to the point where I've mastered whatever skill I need to make whatever it is I'm making look the way I want it to. It's a challenge upon which I thrive. I like to do things to the very best of my ability and then push those boundaries. (Oh, I may complain, but I do love it.)
On the other hand, while I'm being accused of being an 'over-achiever' and trying to be 'perfect', I am greatly bothered by others who do things in a half-assed manner - it's 'good enough'. Then they stop trying and stop learning. They've made the thing or done the action just enough to say that they can make the thing or do the action, but only barely. I'm not talking about people who do or make things just for fun. For some, it's the process that counts. For others, it's the final result. For others still, it's both process and result. But the people who are making or doing things where they couldn't be bothered to properly learn the process and then beam over their lack-luster results (or even wonder why it didn't come out the way they were hoping), expecting praise just because they have done the action or made the thing...well, it bothers me just as much, I suppose, as those who are bothered by my 'over-achieving' and 'perfectionism'.
I sometimes wonder if all this praise for doing things in a half-assed manner and obtaining half-assed results is due to this constant praise children have been given since at least I was a kid (my parents were the sort who provided constructive critism). Everything a child did and does now is perfect and marvelous, even if it's obvious they're only half-trying. We couldn't possibly give a child constructive criticism because that would hurt their feelings </sarcasm>, which I believe has bled over into the adult world. I'm not saying a person should not feel pride in doing or making something if they really gave it their all even if the results are less than average, but that's exactly there where they should not stop trying. A person can always do better.
I propose that there is nothing wrong with trying to do something better and aiming for better results. Surely, there are limits to this: a person's financial situation, location, strength, resources available, etc. And sometimes a person's skill or body shape will be a hindrance, but in many cases certainly can be overcome or worked around. The complacency many people show (sometimes myself included) when confronted with a hurdle drives me crazy. It almost immediatly illicits "oh, I can't do that because of 'x'", instead of thinking a way over the hurdle: "okay, I can't do that now, but when I learn or do 'x', I'll have a better chance at it". I believe that complacency comes from ignorance and laziness. I know, I'm treading thin ice here and will likely make a lot of people upset. Well, fine. I used to be one of those people who never thought she could do anything because of some commonly believed old wives' tales, the 'truth' that the masses blindly believe without any logical supporting evidence. Again, I am guilty of that as well I'm sure, but as soon as I realize my mistake, I do my best to correct it. In the meantime, I practice everything to try and get it as near perfect as I can manage. Even in household affairs. It's hard work, but it's worth it.
I'm seen as an 'over-achiever' because I like to do thing to the best of my ability and then try to do it better. I try to do a lot, to squeeze as much into each day as possible. I try to be generous, but I also try to be kind to myself. Financially, I give when I can, spending a reasonable amount, but I also know I need to save for the future. I try to keep things organized. I try to do the responsible thing when warranted. I know other people may be counting on me, and I try very, very hard not to let them down, because I know exactly how that feels and I care (perhaps too much) for pretty much everyone. I know I will never be perfect, but I'm bothered by comments and ridicule when I try to get close to perfection. No one ridicules the person who sews the half-assed quilt or keeps a messy house or speaks shoddy [insert foreign language], but I get picked on when I take the extra steps to make sure the seams line up and the hand quilting is even or when I spend 70 hours a week studying German. Or even when I take some time to do housework. Constructive criticism is completely different, and I welcome that. (But I wonder that no one gives the half-assed quilt maker any constructive criticism either.)
My quest to learn and try to do things to the best of my ability - my 'over-achiever' and 'perfectionist' qualities - seem to make it appear as if there is something wrong with me. That because I am not average, I am different and therefore wrong. If only I'd stop trying so hard, I could be happy. Or, I don't need to try that hard, I don't need to be so 'perfect'. Well, if man didn't try so hard or didn't need to be so 'perfect' then we'd still be in the trees, because we'd never had got the hang of efficient hunting techniques out on the savannah. But instead, I'm called 'anal' and 'a perfectionist' and an 'over-achiever'. I do try to take this all in stride, but sometimes it's hard to just shrug off, especially when it's mentioned on a regular basis.
This fits neatly into another point: often, I hear adults telling their children that they 'can do anything or be anything they put their minds to'. Some of those adults turn to me and tell me I shouldn't expect to do x or y because I'm too old or it's unrealistic. This does not apply to statements like 'I want to be a jockey', because I'm realistic in that I know that at 5'8" and at a reasonable weight, I'm far too tall and heavy to be a jockey, and I can't change my genes or shrink. Neither could I be a hospice nurse - I can't deal with the idea that all those people are near death. The statements that their suggestions apply to usually have to do with physical activities or things I'd like to try to make. (I also heard "you'll never be able to do pull-ups because you're a girl". From a man. I'm still really mad about that.) So, that first statement for children, that they 'can do or be anything they want if they put their minds to it' suddenly doesn't apply when you grow up? Does an 18th birthday suddenly restrict a person's course in life? Oh, dear. You're 30. Forget even trying to do x. What? I shouldn't bother trying? Oh dear, you're over 35, that means you'll never do x. Huh? You know, if someone had said 'oh dear, you're 97, you'll never be able to do x', I might believe it, but 35? Should I just sit down on the couch and give up? All because I'm in my 30's? Don't bother trying? I've even heard people tell me not to bother trying to learn a foreign language in my adulthood because I'd 'never be fluent'. (Um, the Austrians swore I was from Germany. Hell, a German cop thought I was lying when I explained to him, in German, that I was an American (my one brush with the law). I learned German in college, which I started when I was 24, thankyouverymuch. I tried really hard and studied all the time. After two intensive years of study and two years studying in Germany, I was indeed fluent.)
Why do people do this? Why do adults discourage other adults from trying things, but they encourage their children? Why is trying really hard to do something well when you're a kid seen as a good quality and when you're an adult a crazy quality? I understand that not all people have the same talents, but skills can usually be learned, some requiring little to no talent. Sometimes all that's needed is hard work. It can be scary and daunting and completely exhausting. But, I can speak German and read a little French, I can do decent calligraphy, I can lay gold leaf well, I can make beautiful quilts, I can spin fiber into yarn, I can travel in foreign countries by myself with confidence, I am of a normal weight and have been for 8+ years, I know a lot about gardening. I had been told I'd never be able to navigate around in a foreign culture and language. It was just too hard and beyond my abilities. I had been told I'd never lose the weight, I just had to get over it. And, despite the fact that I am thirty-six years old and have only been participating in any sort of physical activity in the last two and a half+ years, I can do a handstand (though I still need a wall), I did the splits for the first time a month or so ago (and will again one day), I can run three miles in one go, I can do cartwheels and hang from the trapeze by my knees, I can hang from the trapeze from one hand, I have abdominal muscles that I can see when I look in the mirror, I can hold up a flier in circus class weighing a lot more than I do. All for the first time in my life. The first time. When I started circus school, I was told by a lot of people (among them three medical doctors) that I shouldn't even bother, because I'd never manage to do anything in the way of acrobatics. At my age. So I should give up trying? I should give up trying to do it well? How does this make sense? Haven't I proven everyone who told me I couldn't completely and utterly wrong?
I will continue to try really hard at all of my hobbies and projects, no matter what people say to me. My hobbies are important. The tidiness of my apartment is important. Balancing my finances is important. (Hell, balancing my life is important.) I am not going to give up and plant my butt on the couch just because that is what is expected of me. At my age. Because I am a girl. Because I can't do x (yet). I am not the sort of person who likes necessarily to sit around and watch television all day (being ridiculed for not watching television and for not owning a tv is a whole other rant). My friends are important, too. Sometimes I wish people would think before they start picking on me because I take my 'over-achieving' and 'perfectionist' attitude seriously. The ridicule hurts.
And there is absolutely nothing wrong in trying to do things you do better or trying new things.
Current Location: l'appartement
Current Mood: contemplative
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corset_shoppe
[pitufina]
 | 02:17 pm - Morúa Designs Sample Corset
Hi Everyone! I am selling this brand new Peacock blue corset with outside boning channels.
Closed Measurements – measured on the inside of the corset. Corset is designed to be worn with a gap of 1-2 inches.
Waist: 21”
Hip at 4" below waist: 27”
Under-bust/ ribs at 3" above waist: 26”
Length at CF: 12.5”
( More photos and lots of info )
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jenny_evergreen
 | 08:02 am - Writer's Block: War and peace
Controversy! See, if I were making my own country, and that country had a military, I would decide that mandatory, temporary service would be the only truly egalitarian thing to do. That said, if I were making my own country, it wouldn't HAVE a standing military. Although, now that I'm thinking about it, I think I'd have a non-aggressive social-service equivalent, which would guarantee that everyone would have a real understanding of the role of government in infrastructure and social support. If we all had to work for the government for a few years, we might be a bit less quick to condemn it as useless. (An anarchist I am not!)
I don't think, I KNOW that the USA's current system takes advantage of socioeconomic inequality. All you have to do is watch few of the ads to see that. It didn't create it, though. I think, in individual cases, it can either sustain it or cause it to be overcome. Depends on the person and how their experience affects them. As a whole, sustaining probably edges out overcoming, however.
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/neko/kaokitty/thoughtful.gif) thoughtful
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furhideandbone
[_graywolf_]
 | 10:06 am - Peeking Kingfisher
A kingfisher, sitting down after fishing on the river, quickly realizes he's not alone (Dragonfly)
I held off on posting this one online, since it was entering the championships. But now that the results have been given (sadly, I have NO clue as of yet on how it or the other two did, since I wasn't there) I figured it would be fine to post it.
Brought in by someone that found it while walking. He said all he wanted was to be able to put it in his display cabinet with his collection. Aside from that I was free to do whatever. I still had a HUGE dried out dragonfly in my cabinet as well, and decided to re-hydrate it and use it in the display base.
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rm
 | 10:26 am - Zurich - arrival
After a delay on the flight out, and a very bumpy ride wherein I was only able to write about 3,000 words on various projects, I arrived in Zurich. As the plane was landing, I thought at first I was looking down on towns filled with mountain lakes, but rather, I was seeing clouds pooling in valleys.
In the time since then I have encountered racism and anti-Semitism to the degree that I don't even feel like talking about it right now, been mistaken for French, been astounded by the rudeness of the shopkeepers here and have been consistently addressed as Mr. Maltese, despite the fact that I am wearing a white frilly shirt (something tells me passing will be easier in Europe where masculinity is, I assume, coded somewhat differently).
There is a sex-trade vibe to this city I find peculiar in its obviousness, but not unfamiliar from, oddly, when I went to Rome as a young teen. In the train to the baggage area suddenly the train car was full of the sound of birds and goats and the mountains and then an image of a Swiss Miss in the exactly cliched sense you think I mean who couldn't have been older than sixteen (ample busom aside) leaned in and kissed the side of the train. Everyone giggled nervously and some Brits suggested that this was the future. Elsewhere, I see lots of posters of scantily clad women promoting the excellent of Zurich's nightlife in an incredibly non-specific way.
The city itself is beautiful physically, but odd in that regard as well. It is a mix of beautiful buildings that should house only creatures such as the vampire Lestat and duchesses of countries that have never existed. But these are next to ugly, modernist things that only enhance the oppressive weight of the sky.
At the hotel I was upgraded to a king room out of luck. Compared to anything similar in the US it is small and utilitarian, but the bed is large, the tub is deep and I have a balcony. It is a good hotel room to feel lonely in, which is a good emotion for most of my writing projects; ConSweet is, after all, a story of hotel rooms and loneliness. The desk set-up here also isn't hurting my back (the same cannot be said of my office).
Walking through the train station earlier (which I have been assured is the only thing with any shops open on Sunday), the world erupted with church bells as we stopped into a Rail Information Center that had weird white plush dolls that looked like Adipose in a glass case.
There are a hundred things here I wish to take photographs of already. Posters for "Ben Hur Live" which is some horsemanship show and the film posters for various German-language movies at the cinema down the road.
I normally travel with great ease in the countries I have been where I don't speak the language, having enough Latin, French and Spanish to at least be able to read signs or make out what people are telling me, even if I can't reply in return. This was certainly true when I was last in Italy. German though? I'm hopeless and helpless and only sometimes are signs also in French or English, and it's very hard.
We are right by the river and gulls are everywhere. Small black birds with a white stripe on their beaks swim in the water.
Church bells again now. There are so many churches the waves of sound resonate against each other, and it is as if the city hums like a symphony, waiting.
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ellenmillion
 | 12:03 am
I hath tweeted:
Automatically shipped by LoudTwitter
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pinkdiamond
 | 09:35 pm
I think i have finally got all my old posts tagged.....
And I also have half the chain stitches on the other Reinette sleeve :) If I had to do more i think I'd have driven myself insane. I still need to decide on sleeve lining fabric... and sew the bodice at shoulder and waist seams. Then put in grommets. Sew ruffles and stomacher...
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longhair
[pirategeisha]
 | 02:56 am - Vinegar?
I've heard people talk up vinegar as both a clarifying shampoo OR a conditioner. Is it one or the other? Is it both? How safe are ACV rinses for curly hair?
And because I love pictures, and because y'all might not be quite sick of it yet: my hair, which is a total diva and just wants attention. I did a nice olive oil + lavender deep condition last night (rinsed with Giovanni shampoo then conditioned with DevaCurl) and it feels GOOD.
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electradesigns
 | 01:34 am - Etsy Corsetry Guild Treasury Volume 7
Volume 7 of the Etsy Corsetry Guild Treasury was created by mentionables. Please support these talented corset makers by clicking on all of the featured items and leaving your comment on the treasury.
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singswithtrees
 | 11:06 pm - Gratuitous Icon Post
I have a Gil/Tarvek icon now! Hooray! Now to just get Tyson to finish his fic...
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stillsostrange
 | 12:24 am - Bookkeeping
37. Soulless - Gail Carriger
38. Ghost Ocean - S. M. Peters
39. Darker Angels - M. L. N. Hanover
40. Traveling With the Dead - Barbara Hambly (reread)
I've been carrying this around like a teddy bear the past few days to cope with my deadline stress. I have no idea how many times I've read TwtD since 1996, but I've noticed something. I have always cried on page 327, at the line There was blood on her mouth, and on her hands to the elbow, but the gold of her wedding band shone through. More recently I've started tearing up a few pages earlier. As of today my sinuses start to prickle on 317. Eventually I'm going to start crying as soon as I pick up the book.
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://www.amandadownum.com/images/twmoodtheme/sore.jpg) sunburnt
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